Been a while since I have typed something in this hallowed space so thought I would put in my two cents. I really felt like voicing a sincere thought about the ongoing relief measures taken by the Indian Govt and wanted to really express my thoughts about how skilful planning can overcome many cash-flow hassles.Nobodys asked for it..but hey! what the heck..thats what the blog is for
This is in particular reference to the badly hit coastal Tamil Nadu where the only livelihood of the people was selling fish. They have been deprived of their kith and kins' life and also have been kicked hard in the stomach which is agonizing.NGOs are making their contribution by collecting money from NRIs and also several concerned and considerate people from within and outside the country.But is this enough..sincerely I dont think so !
The Govt has announced a 500 crore budget for relief measures and we hear speculations that they were planning to levy a Tsunami Relief tax on every working man's paycheck. Is this even worth considering at this point. Will every Indian want to pay more tax to the Govt being sure that the channel which the money is routed through has a severe bottleneck and produces a very little output? I am sure there will be schemes like buy a TV on a company loan and get a "Tsunami Tax" rebate...if thats not hitting the nadir ..beat that! In one of the towns in Tamil Nadu there are better transportation facilities made available right now.People in that area are irritated and they suggest that when they needed the transportation the most, the Tamil Nadu Govt stopped it and now when they are rummaging through the debris to find out the bodies of their loved ones, the Govt provides extra bus service connecting.Thats more inhuman than my wierdest thoughts..I will need to make some efforts to match that sadism :-)
Just one or two disturbing things I read in the news papers and it made me feel really frustrated that there is nothing I can do apart from donating money to one of the relief fund agencies and watch the news. Personally here are a list of things I would have really liked to be:
1. Govt already has a good amount of relief fund and it also whole-heartedly appeals to the UN and other nations to "SHOW ME THE MONEY".It is disturbing to read in the papers that "India has not said no to foreign funds". I am sorry..come again.. how does the word "NO" even figure in discussions. Grab whatever help you can get with both hands, " Take the money but use all you can spare first and then use the extra money"
2. Money alone would not do everything. What is also needed is food and medical facilities.I am sure there are many selfless doctors who are working day and night to save as many people as they can but no contribution is less in this regard.Packets of food should be transported by helicopters in severely affected areas and also by road transport( Today I read about this being done..so thats great). Epidemics like cholera, typhoid and others are very possible so vaccination centers should be installed as soon as possible.
3.How many of the insurance companies in India will really feel the pinch in this case. I doubt any of them would.We insure our cars, get health insurance and in extreme cases we get theft or damage insurance on our properties. A mandatory insurance policy however small it might be( as a part of income tax) would really help to ring the " PAYBACK TIME" bell for insurance companies.This is a far-thought but it wouldnt hurt. I have heard about farmers in my village becoming insurance agents for LIC and New India so its not impossible
4.Long term rehabilitation funds for the affected-Most of those who have been most badly hit are fishermen who have lost their boats, houses and nets. The central government should ensure that all such affected people resume their normal lives as soon as possible.

A Flash back on the history of Research

I had promised myself that i wudnt write a blog unless Bailya or Marwadi came up with one of their own. But probably Marwadi didnt 'have a topic' to write on (or nothing interesting to hotlink) and Bailya was too busy maintaining his 'physique' now that he is 'health concious'I thought of writing un meself and not subduing my creative juices :-).

As an aftermath of Goli's 'commiserations' yday...i got more curious about the Veteran's previous research works. After a few days of Googling I uncovered Goli bhais entire 'Discograffe' (Discography for the imbiciles and uninitiated). So here are the complete works of Goli with his previous advisors.

123123 B.C.- 1 A.D. --> Goli's research work is unkown for this period coz it was not recorded. The Long reams of papyrus was lost during the transition of the known Earth from Ice age to bronze age. Some say Alexander The Great destroyed them coz Goli wudnt give in to his flirtatious advances and some say it was gobbled up by Brontosaurus due to lack of trees arnd for all the trees were used to make the humungous amnts of paper Goli required to write his works. Investigations are underway...checkout this space for updates.

1 A.D. - 5 A.D. -->
Advisor:Vatsyayana
Research work:The advantages of practicising Tantrik Sex to obtain 'Pink Perfection' arousal on a 'testbed' in Pakistan with a 'wierdly athletic' Chinese as the Rhesus Monkey.

Sometime during the 14th Century A.D. --> (Goole cudnt come up with exact dates coz this was a 'secret' project)
Advisor: Leonardo DaVinci
Research: Didnt work much with him but just did an independent study with him when he gave me his complete works 'The Davinci code'which I read sitting in the potty and leaving it in the rest-room so that others wudnt be able to find the book for 3 whole months. And it goes without saying that all this was done with flushing twice :-). Current and future work ('Ab main bilkul buddha hoon 'Goli' khaake jeeta hoon...fir bhi aaj bhi ghar ke andhar...tan tan tan dan....)

1669 A.D. - 1687 A.D. -->
Advisor: Sir Issac Newton
Research Work: Delving on the intricacies of the number line and disproving Galileo on how 1 by half is equal to 1/2 and also did a side project with novena rangwala to prove that probability of occurance can be more than 1.

1850 A.D - 1860 A.D -->
Advisor:Charles Darwin
Research work: Evolution of mankind and their friendly interaction with dinosaurs along the way.

1862 A.D. - 1882 A.D. -->
Advisor: Alfred Noble
Research work: He suxx ...Goli made the dynamite and he took the credit (The disease called the 'Marwadi-syndrome'was in the air in the late 1800s...choone se felthi hai). The dynamite technology is used in large scale to build on ideas for blowing up tanks and base stations in the new age computer game called Enemy Territory.

1901 A.D. - 1942 A.D. -->
Advisor: Albert Einstein
Research work: The theory of relativity and how that is related to the dynamics of figure skating.

1942 A.D. - 1945 A.D. --> World War II

1945 A.D. - 1947 A.D. --> Quit India movement and India's Independence.

1999 A.D - 2002 A.D. -->
Advisor: Mithun Minhas
Research: On the extrapolation of Baseball strategies into front foot forward defence to smother the spin on 'blood covered' wickets of Srinagar.

2002 A.D. - 2004 A.D. -->
Advisor: Dr.Strangelove :-)
Research: DIAS FEC codes as a sequel to Amit's fucked up screwed up project work for BER part of ECC to imbibe a token of System view with a broad overview of PDF and PMF over-ruling Monte-Carlo's ABC ( not A B C of grading mind u).

After reading the entire works of such a great man i feel im really really honoured to have such a great 'busurgh' as my roomie. Sir Goli ur 9999 years have finally paid off...congratulations on graduating

-Balls

A day like all other...a nite like none other

I had a relatively quite bday (w/o the bash)in comparison to the Bday we had the previous nite. Most of my buddies had come over to wish me (albeit reluctantly) at the stroke of midnight.As the day wore on it took shape of 'just another day' types. But hold on to ur horses...it wasnt the case...coz KAKA saves the day again!

When Jo came over from India...he brought stuff from my folks back home...and to my disbelief and delight,my mom sent me the VCD of 'Disco Dancer' as a bday gift(try to top that guys)! So a relatively uneventful day had a 'kahani mein twist' types culmination i had thought. So here we were on 8th Dec roughly arnd 9ish in front of the computer weaving our way into millimeters of pocket space that was remaining in my bedroom all set...waiting with bated breath to watch Mithunda in action.This is how the nite unfolded...

Marwadi was snoring his way to glory even before the starting credits read 'Director : Babar Subhash'(Vishal all respects to the great man...have to say his first name and not just B Subhash). So it was 1/0 before a single ball being bowled...it was left to me,bailya,srikant,mithunda,kaka and bappi da to steady the ship. The movie started with a Bang (not BANG BANG mind u)...with KAKA and a fucking inconsequential 11 yr Wannabe Star kid singing 'Goron ki na kalon ki...duniya hai dilwalon ki' (wah Anjaan saab).KAKA was doing a Petrucci cum Portnoy cum Jetro Tull cum Ravindra Jain playing the Guitar with one hand and Congo with his other and a flute in his mouth.Ive heard a lot of music/musicians but this was easily the best solo performance that i had ever seen...unbelievable guitar riffs interspersed with break-neck speed axing coming out of an archiac 50 paise Gibson acoustic guitar...and hey all this played with one hand!! KAKA... Freaks Inc commemorates u with the 'KAKESIAN' award for musical excellence.

KAKA disappeared from the movie all of a sudden, apparently he had left for greener pastures to his gaon (and apparently also the gaon of all sadakchaap singers 'Rampur'). Enter Mithun da(read GOD)practi'sing'/honing his supernatural gift of singing and dancing which he apparently learnt from the streets of Bbay (yeh galiyon ne mujhe sur sikhaye aur yeh susan sadak ne mujhe taal...i cried). He is pitted against an established superstar Karan 'son of a gun' razdan whose only dialogues in the movie are 'SAM is great...SAM is the greatest' and 'Bastard'. What really catches the eye are the slick and debonair choreography by the legends Vijay-Oscar...making that choot Karan dance is a monumental task in itself...making him sweep (jhadoo) the dance floor with elegant rolling moves was just plain brilliance.

As Mithun da outshines Sam-The Jhadoowala, his success is not taken well by the magaaan yinsaan OmShivpuri (who is apparently wanted by the CBI for Violation of Indian Penal Code IPC 56334 - overuse of Safari Suit/Blazers). He appoints a menacing 'cereal' killer from London 'Bosco' to exterminate Jimmy...guess who that Killer is...its too difficult...u will never get it...SURPRISE SURPRISE its 'Bob Christo'!!! (I told ya...not to try). Nevertheless a plan is being hatched where its decided that Bob wud 'Konneckt' 5000 W of power supply to Jimmy's guitar and 'Current' him to death (here is the secret guys dont let this out...NY mein 3 day power cut iske wajah se gaya tha). Due to excessive current influx through the metal strings the electro magnetic force created spews out radiant red light through the body of the guitar(Einstein suxx..shudve learnt something under the tutelage of Babbar Subhash...i cried again coz we never recognise homegrown physicists). Ofcourse Jimmy's pyaari maa intervenes and saves Jimmy's ass. I was 'shocked' at the numerous and each magnanimous sacrifices she had to endure that she finally succumbed to it(cud hear in the backgrnd 'Maa chor beta chor'... Marwadi was now crying in his sleep).

Jimmy now has 'Guitar-phobia' which no doctor in the world can cure...except for one person(take ur time to guess who...ill reveal it in just a bit)...dekte hain 'Internation Disco Dance Competeesson' mein. 2 absolutely mind blowing performances from 'THE KING AND QUEEN OF DISCO' from 'Afreekaa' and 'Pareees'leaves the audience wanting for more. Enter Jimmy wearing skin tight lycra pants and the sleeveless t-shirt that was made world famous in reel life by raaj babbar in the movie 'Majdoor' and marwadi in real life.But he still cant sing coz of his phobia...enter the one and only...fresh from his exploits in the underground metal scene at Rampur and this years recepient of KAKESIAN award for musical excellence...the master of an atmospheric amalgam of partial chords, harmonics, echo repeats, drones, slide, feedback, and other effects...KAKA! 'Gaa Beta Gaa'...gone...guitar phobia gone...u never thought u wud believe in musical healing did u (Babar Subhash was also a psychologist/biochemist apart from doing ground breaking work in physics...step aside DaVinci). Goes w/o saying that Jimmy goes on to win the contest but the cereal killer is back...fresh from eating Honey bunches of oats.He shoots at Jimmy but the great man KAKA...outpaces the bullet...jumps+double sumersault+3 backflips and lands b4 mithun to save the day....again. Kaka's death that ensues after that is most brillaint and touching piece of acting that ive ever seen(All of us were crying by this point).

Here is a solemn pledge...From now onwards for a stunning cameo we will henceforth never ever say...he did a Kevin Spacey...He did a KAKA is wat is befitting. KAKA we salute u...babbar we r proud of u...Einstein u suck. THIS WAS THE BEST BDAY THAT I EVER HAD (aarti said it...im saying it...and even Mayor Uncle's daughter from Disco Dancer said it...Its in the air u know). Frankly the only flaw in the movie was that Goli didnt die in agony in the end...all in all thank u KAKA,Bob Christo and Zubesko for making my day.

-Balls
(Marwadi is now crying coz the blog has come to an end)

'Blog' most popular word on web dictionary


The most requested online definition this year was "blog" - a word not even yet officially in the dictionary, Merriam-Webster says.

Editors had planned to include "blog" - the short term for Web log - in the 2005 annual update of both the print and online versions of Merriam-Webster's 11th Collegiate Dictionary, said Arthur Bicknell, spokesman for the dictionary publisher.

But in face of demand, the company quickly added an early definition to some of its online sites, defining "blog" as "a Web site that contains an online personal journal with reflections, comments, and often hyperlinks provided by the writer."

Typically, it takes about 20 years of usage for a word to become prominent enough to merit a place in an abridged dictionary. Some Internet terms and new diseases, such as AIDS and SARS, have made it in a fraction of that time.

"Blog" began appearing in newspapers and magazines in 1999, according to the publisher's records. Merriam's lexicographers suspect the prominence blogs attained during the presidential campaigns and conventions this year sent people scrambling for a definition.

It does sometimes happen that words in the headlines so grab people's attention that they become a most-frequently-looked-up word," said John M. Morse, president and publisher of Springfield-based Merriam-Webster.

Right behind "blog" in popularity on Merriam's year-end list were "incumbent" and "electoral." Other words on the list touched on the war in Iraq, storms, bicycle races and even the emergence of insects on a 17-year cycle: In fourth place was "insurgent," followed by "hurricane," "cicada" and "peloton." The eighth and ninth spots were taken by "partisan" and "sovereignty."

Bicknell said the company's Web sites get 10 lookup requests per second on average, and more than 100 per second during peak hours.


-Balls