A dream come true ? :)
This is one of the funniest videos I have seen ... Enjoy!!!
Friday, May 26, 2006
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Ladies and Gentlemen: The biggest sports event of the year is here
So the football world cup starts in exactly 15 days from now. I know most of us are eagerly waiting this event...its gonna be a cracker. I had a brief conversation with Aup yday which had to be teared down coz of bhaiyya's ignorance :-). If you go by the past WC finals, the last really interesting un was the 1986 finals. The ones after that were absolutely drab. More often than not the really interesting stuff happens in the quaters or Semis (remember Brazil v Holland in the 94 and 98 WCs?). Imagine Brazil facing Argentina in a furious tension filled final...hmmm mouth watering to say the least. How i wish that a WC final cud be as tasty as probably the best match i've ever seen....Holland v Czech in the 2004 Euro....well i wud frankly be surprised if such a big occasion produces a classic...it hardly happens in any sport.
Going thru my same old cliched favs and support blog before any big series.....lemme start first. Frankly its hard to see beyond Brazil this time too and to me they certainly are the favourites. But im gonna stick out my neck a little and say that England wud win this. As far as my support goes...its always the same...Argentina first and Holland second...hard to support any one else. Nevertheless I certainly wudnt mind Czech or Portugal or England taking the honors. Hell i wud support anyone other that those miserly Italians, miserable Germans, over-rated Spanish Armada or the proud French....and for heavens sake not Brazil...its getting too repititive. Look forward to hear ur thoughts....
-Balls
Going thru my same old cliched favs and support blog before any big series.....lemme start first. Frankly its hard to see beyond Brazil this time too and to me they certainly are the favourites. But im gonna stick out my neck a little and say that England wud win this. As far as my support goes...its always the same...Argentina first and Holland second...hard to support any one else. Nevertheless I certainly wudnt mind Czech or Portugal or England taking the honors. Hell i wud support anyone other that those miserly Italians, miserable Germans, over-rated Spanish Armada or the proud French....and for heavens sake not Brazil...its getting too repititive. Look forward to hear ur thoughts....
-Balls
Monday, May 15, 2006
IPOD taglines
Thinking of buying a 30g IPOD but I am not able to come up with an apt tagline. I was thinking of leveraging Freaks Inc's creative quotient to pick one for my pod. Help needed..as you all know it should be a 23 character tagline.
-Aup
-Aup
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Tale of a TIP
A shocking incident happened today. Chintan, Rachit and I had been to watch the movie "Darna mana Hai" in Burlington, NJ and on our way back decided to have dinner at "Minella's Diner" in Wayne, PA. Throughout the drive to Minella's we were pretty apprehensive about having to deal with one particular waiter, the Puerto Rican, who has undoubtedly got to be the rudest horse's arse of a personality alive. We sunk into our alloted booth and were thinking about what to order given that underprivileged menu. No prizes for guessing here that we were waited upon by the same guy who still doesnt seem to have found a job elsewhere. Surprisingly, I was greeted by a smile this time as he took my order for coffee and pancakes.
We finished our dinner and as usual we added the TIP of 4$ on a bill of 20 on the credit card itself, since no one had change in their pockets. As we were reversing our car out of the parking lot we saw that Puerto Rican waiter (PRW) approaching our car. I lowered the windows thinking that he is coming to give us something which we might have forgotten on our table.
PRW (throwing a 25 cent coin at us) : I don't need this..keep it for yourself.
I couldn't quite fathom the reason for such a reaction. Not knowing what hit us, we parked the car again thinking about going back in to clarify the reason for such an act.
As we went back in, I pointed my finger towards the waiter calling him to justify his act, but he chickened out and went back into the kitchen leaving another waiter and two waitresses to do the job.
Aup: I don't quite understand what did the PRW mean when he threw this 25 cent coin at us. What was he thiking.
The other waiter: He must have found that 25 cent coin on your table and he came to return it to you.
Us: Wait a minute..that can't be. He rudely threw the coin at us..so he might not be just returning our coin back. His body language would have been completely different had he come out to return the change we had spilled on the table.
The other waiter: You guys never TIP so he must have thought that 25 cents left on the table was the TIP.
Us: What?? First of all we have never walked out of any restaurant in the US without leaving a 15% TIP at least if not more. And even now, we have given a TIP and you can check it if you want.
Meanwhile, the owner of the shop just walked into the conversation and played a cameo. He had brought our receipt with him and pointed out the 4$ TIP. We stood vindicated but I still could not let him go on the basis of his apparent misjudgement.
Aup: I think that TIP is gratuity given with pleasure. If you give us horrible service there is no reason why I should leave a TIP. That apart I have never walked out of this place without leaving at least a 15% tip.
The other waiter: Then I am sorry sir, there has been a misunderstanding.
Us: We dont care. TIP or no TIP this is not a way to treat your customers
The other waiter and the waitresses: This will never happen again
Us: This won't happen again if we come here again. We will make sure that we don't come to this place again.
And we just walked out of there.
I was horrified with the treatment meted out to us and it surely does affect you cos you know that you haven't done anything wrong. A jerk just comes along and spoils your day so you should not let him go without clarifying and justifying your point. Hell..I don't even know why we argued with the other waiters instead of just taking the matter to the manager because after all don't birds of a feather flock together ?. We were just discussing on our way back that its rather better to just let this thing go because there is a reason why he is a waiter and somethings should just be !
We finished our dinner and as usual we added the TIP of 4$ on a bill of 20 on the credit card itself, since no one had change in their pockets. As we were reversing our car out of the parking lot we saw that Puerto Rican waiter (PRW) approaching our car. I lowered the windows thinking that he is coming to give us something which we might have forgotten on our table.
PRW (throwing a 25 cent coin at us) : I don't need this..keep it for yourself.
I couldn't quite fathom the reason for such a reaction. Not knowing what hit us, we parked the car again thinking about going back in to clarify the reason for such an act.
As we went back in, I pointed my finger towards the waiter calling him to justify his act, but he chickened out and went back into the kitchen leaving another waiter and two waitresses to do the job.
Aup: I don't quite understand what did the PRW mean when he threw this 25 cent coin at us. What was he thiking.
The other waiter: He must have found that 25 cent coin on your table and he came to return it to you.
Us: Wait a minute..that can't be. He rudely threw the coin at us..so he might not be just returning our coin back. His body language would have been completely different had he come out to return the change we had spilled on the table.
The other waiter: You guys never TIP so he must have thought that 25 cents left on the table was the TIP.
Us: What?? First of all we have never walked out of any restaurant in the US without leaving a 15% TIP at least if not more. And even now, we have given a TIP and you can check it if you want.
Meanwhile, the owner of the shop just walked into the conversation and played a cameo. He had brought our receipt with him and pointed out the 4$ TIP. We stood vindicated but I still could not let him go on the basis of his apparent misjudgement.
Aup: I think that TIP is gratuity given with pleasure. If you give us horrible service there is no reason why I should leave a TIP. That apart I have never walked out of this place without leaving at least a 15% tip.
The other waiter: Then I am sorry sir, there has been a misunderstanding.
Us: We dont care. TIP or no TIP this is not a way to treat your customers
The other waiter and the waitresses: This will never happen again
Us: This won't happen again if we come here again. We will make sure that we don't come to this place again.
And we just walked out of there.
I was horrified with the treatment meted out to us and it surely does affect you cos you know that you haven't done anything wrong. A jerk just comes along and spoils your day so you should not let him go without clarifying and justifying your point. Hell..I don't even know why we argued with the other waiters instead of just taking the matter to the manager because after all don't birds of a feather flock together ?. We were just discussing on our way back that its rather better to just let this thing go because there is a reason why he is a waiter and somethings should just be !
Thursday, April 27, 2006
The Rare Privilege
Author's note: I had written this in the 11th standard for my college magazine, so don't critcize it too much :). Ran across it right now and thought maybe it will breathe some life into our blog.
The thing that intrigued me most on my first day at office
was that the house that was given to me as my ‘quarters’ had
an unbelievably good driveway. I was so impressed with the
asphalt that I asked my assistant as to how this was
achieved. My assistant, a tall thin man in his forties with a
droop in his shoulders that comes with age, said, "I haven’t
the slightest idea, sir. The men at the public works
department look after the necessary details." I left the
matter at that and proceeded with my work for the day.
My work day was always hectic. Get up at seven in the
morning, get ready by eight and be at office by nine. Then it
was work by the tonne -- the usual thing that comes with a
salaried position as a public servant. There was one thing
though. A chauffer-driven car used to drive me from my home
to the office. Every day, the asphalt road always used to
catch my eye, "How do they keep it so smooth?" I used to ask
myself. But then the work at the office was always so
burdening that I forgot it till the end of the day when I
came back in the car. I was puzzled -- 'Can’t the public
works department keep all the roads so fine? In that case, we
wouldn’t have road problems.'
It was Sunday morning. I was sleeping leisurely, happy in the
thought that I did not have to go to office today. I was
lazing around when suddenly, I was awakened by a sharp knock
on the door. "Come in!" I said a little irritated, cursing
whoever that was at the door for ruining my well-earned
rest. "Sorry to wake you up, sir, but today you have to go to
visit the children at the spastics society. The people at the
society are eager for a loan for the new computer wing they
are planning to set up."
'Spastics society? What spastics society? Who scheduled this
meeting?' I thought. "Okay, give me twenty minutes." Is all I
said to Mr. Basu, my assistant, "And is Rampal here?" I asked
referring to my chauffeur. I liked to call people by their
names rather than their designations. This was okay since I
was boss now but in my yesteryears, when I was a junior to
many people, my habit caused me a lot of problems! "The
chauffeur is here," said Mr. Basu. Obviously, he did not like
my way of looking at people. But he was a nice sort of a
chap, really.
In twenty minutes, I was ready and inside the car. "Zara
jaldi chalo, Rampal,(Be quick, Rampal)" I said as I got into
the car. Mr. Basu came in through the other door. Rampal only
nodded, he was not a talkative kind of character like most of
the chauffeurs I had met earlier in my life, he only spoke
when necessary, and such times were rare. But at the wheel he
was courageous to the point of being defiant. He could zip
through any kind of traffic with the grace of a panther going
through tall grass to catch its prey. I was also informed
that he was also trained in evasive driving, but I did not
believe it, after all what would a chauffeur do in Delhi’s
overcrowded streets? Well, my thoughts were now on what the
meeting was about. I did not remember anything being
mentioned. That was when Mr. Basu spoke, "The visit is just
to finalize the project and to grant the money." "Yes but
can’t someone else go?" "Well, sir, to tell you the truth, it
is good for your image if you yourself go!" Sometimes I
wondered how Mr. Basu could do everything, from managing my
day to looking after my image at the same time. Darned
asphalt road. The road was once again on my mind. 'Well,
right now, all the roads in the world can go to hell as long
as the one that takes me to the Spastics Society is without
any hitch.' The visit went smoothly. I really liked the way
the teachers of the society wanted to teach the children with
the aid of computers. The project was a very good one and I
had no problem whatsoever in sanctioning the loan.
While coming back, I was still thinking of the novel way that
the teachers had devised to improve the life of the poor
little children... The rest of the drive was uneventful. When
we were close to the driveway, on impulse, I asked Rampal to
stop. Rampal did as ordered. I got out and before the
personnel in the police car could do anything, got into the
front seat even as I ushered Rampal into the seat at the
side. I asked Rampal, "It must be a good feeling to drive on
that road?" I said pointing to the driveway. Rampal just
shrugged. He didn’t know what to say. I started the engine,
depressed the clutch, put the car in gear, stepped on the
accelerator and let the clutch go. The car lurched forward
with a screech of the tyres. I entered the driveway at full
speed, honking the horn. It felt good driving a car on the
fine asphalt road. The asphalt road, the clean, well-kept
asphalt road. I think it came as a privilege to the Prime
Minister of the country.
The thing that intrigued me most on my first day at office
was that the house that was given to me as my ‘quarters’ had
an unbelievably good driveway. I was so impressed with the
asphalt that I asked my assistant as to how this was
achieved. My assistant, a tall thin man in his forties with a
droop in his shoulders that comes with age, said, "I haven’t
the slightest idea, sir. The men at the public works
department look after the necessary details." I left the
matter at that and proceeded with my work for the day.
My work day was always hectic. Get up at seven in the
morning, get ready by eight and be at office by nine. Then it
was work by the tonne -- the usual thing that comes with a
salaried position as a public servant. There was one thing
though. A chauffer-driven car used to drive me from my home
to the office. Every day, the asphalt road always used to
catch my eye, "How do they keep it so smooth?" I used to ask
myself. But then the work at the office was always so
burdening that I forgot it till the end of the day when I
came back in the car. I was puzzled -- 'Can’t the public
works department keep all the roads so fine? In that case, we
wouldn’t have road problems.'
It was Sunday morning. I was sleeping leisurely, happy in the
thought that I did not have to go to office today. I was
lazing around when suddenly, I was awakened by a sharp knock
on the door. "Come in!" I said a little irritated, cursing
whoever that was at the door for ruining my well-earned
rest. "Sorry to wake you up, sir, but today you have to go to
visit the children at the spastics society. The people at the
society are eager for a loan for the new computer wing they
are planning to set up."
'Spastics society? What spastics society? Who scheduled this
meeting?' I thought. "Okay, give me twenty minutes." Is all I
said to Mr. Basu, my assistant, "And is Rampal here?" I asked
referring to my chauffeur. I liked to call people by their
names rather than their designations. This was okay since I
was boss now but in my yesteryears, when I was a junior to
many people, my habit caused me a lot of problems! "The
chauffeur is here," said Mr. Basu. Obviously, he did not like
my way of looking at people. But he was a nice sort of a
chap, really.
In twenty minutes, I was ready and inside the car. "Zara
jaldi chalo, Rampal,(Be quick, Rampal)" I said as I got into
the car. Mr. Basu came in through the other door. Rampal only
nodded, he was not a talkative kind of character like most of
the chauffeurs I had met earlier in my life, he only spoke
when necessary, and such times were rare. But at the wheel he
was courageous to the point of being defiant. He could zip
through any kind of traffic with the grace of a panther going
through tall grass to catch its prey. I was also informed
that he was also trained in evasive driving, but I did not
believe it, after all what would a chauffeur do in Delhi’s
overcrowded streets? Well, my thoughts were now on what the
meeting was about. I did not remember anything being
mentioned. That was when Mr. Basu spoke, "The visit is just
to finalize the project and to grant the money." "Yes but
can’t someone else go?" "Well, sir, to tell you the truth, it
is good for your image if you yourself go!" Sometimes I
wondered how Mr. Basu could do everything, from managing my
day to looking after my image at the same time. Darned
asphalt road. The road was once again on my mind. 'Well,
right now, all the roads in the world can go to hell as long
as the one that takes me to the Spastics Society is without
any hitch.' The visit went smoothly. I really liked the way
the teachers of the society wanted to teach the children with
the aid of computers. The project was a very good one and I
had no problem whatsoever in sanctioning the loan.
While coming back, I was still thinking of the novel way that
the teachers had devised to improve the life of the poor
little children... The rest of the drive was uneventful. When
we were close to the driveway, on impulse, I asked Rampal to
stop. Rampal did as ordered. I got out and before the
personnel in the police car could do anything, got into the
front seat even as I ushered Rampal into the seat at the
side. I asked Rampal, "It must be a good feeling to drive on
that road?" I said pointing to the driveway. Rampal just
shrugged. He didn’t know what to say. I started the engine,
depressed the clutch, put the car in gear, stepped on the
accelerator and let the clutch go. The car lurched forward
with a screech of the tyres. I entered the driveway at full
speed, honking the horn. It felt good driving a car on the
fine asphalt road. The asphalt road, the clean, well-kept
asphalt road. I think it came as a privilege to the Prime
Minister of the country.
Saturday, April 01, 2006
Another bloddy Friday
I was thinking of what I was going to do this weekend and I had sort of planned out my week's work based on what I thought I was (going to do). Firstly, I needed to fill my tax forms and then the second and inevitable one ...be on call support for my 'run of the mill' Java programmer's job. So, when Jaadya called me on Tuesday expressing a desire to spend the weekend in Bhaiyya and my company I replied in the negative. The week flew past and everything went as planned. Finally it was Friday..it was either going to be the same old meet everyone and while away time weekend or accomplish something weekend.
Started off the day pretty well..got to work pretty early and the day seemed to progress well. Had forgotten my cell phone at home and hence there was no connection with the outside world once I was in office. The day ended at a miserable 6pm in the evening and I drove out when there were very few cars in the parking lot . At around 8.30, I just checked my voicemails and the text messages I had recieved and there sure were a myriad of them. Bhaiyya had hurled innumerable abuses which I chose to ignore and there were others who had left explicit voice-mails. Just before that, I had got to know that I wouldn't be on support for the weekend and decided to call up Jaadya. Surprisingly, he picked up the fone on the first ring and I was not treated to his disgusting stuttering voicemail "Hi..this is Srikant Sub...". Seemingly Jaadya had receivd a royal snub from all that were near and dear to him and was cooling his heels in "Hell's( His final destination..if there is any semblance of justice) Kitchen", NY. Apparently Bhaiyya had a deadline to meet and was unsure of making it to Philly and he had already conveyed his thoughts to Jaadya.When I called Bhaiyya, I learnt that the promise which he had given me ( that he would repay me by making a trip to Philly) was shockingly coming true. He was on 202 North and just 25 minutes away from my place. Jaadya immediately caught the 10.30 Amtrak from New york and after a quick dinner at Bahamas Breeze, I was driving on 76 to pick him up from 30th Street Station. The scenario had changed totally..it was wild, insanely fast and I didnt know what hit me with this rapid change of fortunes. It would give "Fight Club" a run for it's money. Mike had once told me..."life gives you shit ..just take it in our stride"..I couldn't agree more. The whole week I was thinking of having a productive weekend and instead I am resting my lazy ass on my couch at 2.54 am on Saturday morning, writing this worthless blog, lending a deaf ear to Jaadya's Sci-Fi movie stories and planning to play Taboo with Bhaiyya, Jaadya and Chintan . Deja vu ! just another freakin bloddy Friday. Andy Dufrain had said that "Hope is a beautiful thing".. I hope, I pray for that elusive weekend !
Started off the day pretty well..got to work pretty early and the day seemed to progress well. Had forgotten my cell phone at home and hence there was no connection with the outside world once I was in office. The day ended at a miserable 6pm in the evening and I drove out when there were very few cars in the parking lot . At around 8.30, I just checked my voicemails and the text messages I had recieved and there sure were a myriad of them. Bhaiyya had hurled innumerable abuses which I chose to ignore and there were others who had left explicit voice-mails. Just before that, I had got to know that I wouldn't be on support for the weekend and decided to call up Jaadya. Surprisingly, he picked up the fone on the first ring and I was not treated to his disgusting stuttering voicemail "Hi..this is Srikant Sub...". Seemingly Jaadya had receivd a royal snub from all that were near and dear to him and was cooling his heels in "Hell's( His final destination..if there is any semblance of justice) Kitchen", NY. Apparently Bhaiyya had a deadline to meet and was unsure of making it to Philly and he had already conveyed his thoughts to Jaadya.When I called Bhaiyya, I learnt that the promise which he had given me ( that he would repay me by making a trip to Philly) was shockingly coming true. He was on 202 North and just 25 minutes away from my place. Jaadya immediately caught the 10.30 Amtrak from New york and after a quick dinner at Bahamas Breeze, I was driving on 76 to pick him up from 30th Street Station. The scenario had changed totally..it was wild, insanely fast and I didnt know what hit me with this rapid change of fortunes. It would give "Fight Club" a run for it's money. Mike had once told me..."life gives you shit ..just take it in our stride"..I couldn't agree more. The whole week I was thinking of having a productive weekend and instead I am resting my lazy ass on my couch at 2.54 am on Saturday morning, writing this worthless blog, lending a deaf ear to Jaadya's Sci-Fi movie stories and planning to play Taboo with Bhaiyya, Jaadya and Chintan . Deja vu ! just another freakin bloddy Friday. Andy Dufrain had said that "Hope is a beautiful thing".. I hope, I pray for that elusive weekend !
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
We deliver on time
KK was to leave for India on Saturday and I had promised to drop him to the airport. Earlier Aup said he wudn't be able to make it that weekend. Friday evening I got a call from Aup--he was coming to Baltimore…he ofcourse had to kiss his langotia off to India.
We dropped KK to the airport 5 hrs earlier to make sure he doesn't miss his flight :) After leaving the airport I called up Balls and left a voice message saying “The package has been successfully shipped to India.”
Later we goofed around at Ash's (Aup's friend) place, had a good time. Sunday I needed a break and even though Aup's purposeful visit was served, he wouldn’t leave. I expressed (begged / pleaded) in a subtle manner (which is something missing in me--Jhadiya) with an excuse that I needed to go to work. Aup was in no mood to leave, I had to make somebody call me from work and the trick worked. Finally, Aup left for Philly.
In the meanwhile I got a voice message from Balls asking for the tracking number for the shipment to India. I emailed him about the tracking number he requested.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Customer,
As per our telephonic conversation, you requested tracking number for the package IAD->BOM. Our company, Fast Courier Company (FCC), does not provide the tracking number for the shipments. All our shipments reach the destination within 48 hrs and then we provide the proof of delivery, which you will find below.
Sincerely,
FCC
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Hi,
Reached India safely. Flight ekdum khaali tha .. soke gaaya ...
Kausum
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Balls was quite happy with the delivery and he replied
Dear FCC,
Thanks for your prompt delivery and response. Not only is your International delivery quick and on-time, it was evident to me yesterday that your domestic shipment time is impressive too. (I'm referring to the exceptionally fast "good riddance" delivery performed on heavy equipment to Philly). Thanx again for your excellent response time...i dont have to look
anywhere else now!!
A happy customer.
I forwarded the customer's response to Aup
Aup,
Baba ki Jai ho !!
Below you will find the response from one of our major clients..
Balls inc.
FCC
Aup Baba ki tisri aankh khul gayi. In a fit of anger he replied back to the courier company as follows:
FCC is very efficient. It uses the "good riddance" to ship the international delivery and then ships the "good riddance" itself forcefully. I take an oath that I will not set foot in Baltimore.
-A
I was scared of the laser beam which was about to shoot off from tisri aankh and turn me into ashes and dust. I had to appease the Baba so I offered him my sincere apologies and some free coupons…
Dear Customers and Packages,
It has come to our knowledge that some of our "heavy" shipments are not very happy with the treatment given to them. We would like to mention that our focus is on the cheapest, most reliable and efficient service to our dedicated customers. We apologize for the inconvenience caused, but please understand that its all business nothing personal. We would like to offer you a coupon for two samosas and we do appreciate your business.
Thanks You,
Regards,
FCC
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